So here’s the deal. I love Maggie and I can’t wait to spend as many continuous seconds, minutes, hours, days, years and decades with her as I possibly can. She is my person. That said, Maggie and I had a very real moment recently where we honestly asked each other, and ourselves, why we both want to get married. I think once you reach at least a year in, it seems likely you’ve talked about marriage or at least “where this is going” and we have.
So when Maggie and I talked recently about it, all I could think was “nothing is going to change.” And then I sort of panicked, thinking maybe I should have a better answer. Which I did… I believe that the wedding itself is a symbol of partnership, being “in it” with each other, and a time to celebrate with friends and family when you find your person. Like, “Look, look, look! She’s part of our lives, she’s my better half” and welcome her. Yeah, I like to think of it as a welcoming and a bonding of family and friends with each others person and a celebration for the couple who have found love.
This whole blog is about finding, expressing and sharing love. That’s the whole point. Of course I’m all about it. I also know that marriage means that when the shit hits the fan, it’s my responsibility to stay and work it out. Not that I would’ve otherwise dropped it like it’s hot or something, but seriously, there’s no longer an option to leave. This is us, we chose this, we’re in it together and we’ll figure it out.
Maggie and I continue to talk, ponder, and learn more about each other and ourselves. Just tonight Maggie said, “I love you so much. I’ll always take good care of you. Sometimes even better than I do myself, but I guess that’s why we need love. That’s why people get married, so we can take care of each other even better that we would ourselves.” It was the sweetest thing, and with that she said, “Add that to our ‘why we’re getting married’ list.” I didn’t know that list existed until now, so we’re starting it… why not?
Why not better understand why instead of just doing it because that’s what’s “supposed” to be done after a certain period of time or people look at you funny? It’s our responsibility that when we have the chance to hold another heart in ours, that we’re conscious, honest and aware of what we’re doing. It’s easy to get caught up in the high of love and quite another to stop and ask the hard questions. For us, it started with “why marriage?” and it has led us down and through so many conversations and opportunities to get to know and understand each other even better — to strengthen our bond, to lay the foundation and to love our love.